troubles again

It's been a humiliating kind of afternoon. I found out that instead of calling me, Anthony had Donna go with him and work with him after work all afternoon. I was crushed and embarrassed that he would prefer her company rather than mine. He never even asked me if I'd like to clean that boat even though I've showed interest in doing that kind of work and asked him about my doing it before. That's on top of the fact that he knows how I feel about that witch Donna. I have not in any, way, shape, or form hidden my feelings about her and him dealing with her. He has no regard for my feelings. He does what he wants, with who he wants, when he wants to do it. I hate that he doesn't respect me any more than to spend time with her outside of  work when he clearly knows how I feel but then again, that's my fault for having  expectations of someone's respect that doesn't even respect himself. He just tries me so much that I'm drained from it all. I am sick of this stuff! I'm sick and tired of watching him be sick and tired of everything. If I hear him say 
"  I'm sick of this shit." or"   I do and I do"   one more time I do believe I will puke!
Now my son wants to know if Donna will be his new Mommy and if she's black. He thinks 'cause she's the one riding Daddy around everywhere that they're dating. Now I wish I'd never had said anything to Anthony 'cause all he does is what he always does, tries to turn it around on me so that it's my fault. Now he says he let her do it 'cause I can't clean a boat. I know I can clean and/or detail a boat. 
And another thing: This morning he said he was going to go to his DWI class tonight but here it is 6pm the meeting is started and he's here cooking on the grill. I'll go to my meeting though and be better off for having gone. That's my plan anyway. It'd be much easier to cop out since I've got to help my nephew get his project done and still helping A.J. do his homework, but I know now I MUST start doing again what I know is good for me, even when what's good for me is not easy or comfortable. I'm practicing I've just got a long long long ways to go.
I do want to say before I close today, how much I enjoyed Colin's funeral service. It was almost as big a hit as his presence was in a room. The family did a spectacular job and my favorite parts were his Daughter's and Brother's and his Niece's words about him. The SPIRIT moved Lark to fore go her prepared speech and witness to someone about forgiveness. It was beautiful but I still want to hear her prepared speech that would have to of been grand!